As I've mentioned previously, for the past year and few months, I've been the one researching, putting together inspiration boards, and getting the basic "skeleton" of the wedding in place. Now that we are about 8 months away (OMG), it's time to implement some of those abstract ideas and sit down and really work out what we want for our big day.
A few nights ago, we talked music - what we could use for the processional, recessional, and first dance songs. While I've been compiling music for months, Foxy kind of opened my eyes to something: these songs need to be US. While we have similar taste in music, some things are definitely much more my taste and some are much more his. Naturally, I was picking things in "my style" of music; I was hell bent on using this one particular song for our first dance, but you know what? Foxy doesn't even know the band. As perfect as the lyrics and the music may be, it's not his thing. And we can't be dancing to a song that will forever be "our song" if he doesn't like it. So we spent an hour scouring our music collections and came up with some really great, unique possibilities that are so incredibly US.
We also talked about reception music - what will be played, what won't be played, the general vibe, etc. The second thing we booked for the wedding was our DJ, and Foxy was sold on said DJ from the get-go because he's open to us giving him a list of play/don't play songs and is willing to play some of our more alternative/indie music (this is key - not all DJ's will do this!). During said recent conversation with Foxy, I realized that I've kind of been off in la-la land planning and creating a certain vibe for our future wedding without checking in with him enough. He thought we'd be giving the DJ a specific list of what we want played, mostly the alt/indie stuff, with not very much "top 40" mixed in. When he mentioned this, all I heard in my mind was a big, fat SCREEEEECH.
I'm a dancer - have danced my whole life, even a bit professionally - and aside from that, I love dancing to top 40 nonsense. I mean, it's dance-y. I also know that other people like dancing to top 40 nonsense. It's just what is played at weddings. I thought we'd have maybe 10 or so atypical songs of mine and Foxy's choosing, but I'd leave the rest to the DJ to decide - read the crowd and whatnot. The one thing I want and need from the reception part of our wedding is a good dance party. It can rain, we can not have enough chairs, whatever.. what would be most devastating is if people aren't shaking their little tail feathers and having a blasty blast.
Foxy and I talked it out - we still haven't come to a definite conclusion about the reception music yet - but we agreed to talk more about it in the future with each other and with our DJ. Communication is definitely key - even if your groom gives you the go-ahead to do most of the researching and final decision making. In other words, don't be fooled - your man may not always show it, but he does care about the details that make up the big day!
Another (and much briefer) recent conversation was about flowers - I mentioned how much I was loving the look of baby's breath bouquets for the bridesladies.
Image via Style Me Pretty | Photo by You Look Nice Today Photography
Little did I know, as relatively blasé as he generally is about the flowers we will have, he actively does NOT want all baby's breath bouquets. Duly noted. However! He also said that a nice mix of something else with the bb would be ok. So we still have some possibilities there!
Lastly, and perhaps the biggest talk we've had thus far pertained to our vows - whether we would write our own or not. I just figured we would write our own since so much of our wedding will have a more modern twist to it, but Foxy very much doesn't want to. This convo deserves a post of it's own, but it was good to sit down and really get an idea of what I want versus what he wants.. what I picture versus what he pictures for our big day.
So all in all.. even though I've realized that some aspects of our wedding will need to be rethought and worked out some more, I couldn't be happier with how personalized and US our wedding will ultimately end up being. I'm also kind of loving how involved Foxy is getting and wants to be with the rest of the planning.
I'd say he's a keeper. ;)
